Once upon a time, I left corporate to start freelancing. This was 9 years ago. I was broke, and had an old 2nd hand laptop. My husband then had no job.
Unfortunately the laptop which was our bread & butter broke down. I came to this person who was supposed to be the only person I could run to to ask for help. She had a laptop in almost new condition which she was barely using anyway. I asked her if I could borrow it and told her my dilemma.
Unfortunately, she smirked & gave me the face. She doesn't want me to touch her laptop. She knew my online job then was our only source of income. But she never bothered to help.
Fast forward to today, this person is coming to me for help on how she can transition from full time teaching to freelancing. Looks like she has totally forgotten the incident.
A classic example of the saying that goes, "if you were absent in my struggles, don't expect to be there during my success".
If it were you, turuan nu ba?
By the way, this person is blood related.
55 Replies
The help you asked her was for you to borrow a physical device (good as new pa po talaga as you said). And what you wanted to do with it po was a 50/50 chance which could lead pa na masira/mawala from that someone. Understandable naman po yung pag decline nya sa request nyo po (baka din may sentimental value pa yun). Tapos yung help naman po na hinihingi nya sayo is something na hindi po mawawala or masisira kung ibabahagi nyo po sa kanya.. Long story short, wag mo nalang po gawing basehan yung past na nangyari sa inyong dalawa para magtanim ka po ng sama ng loob. I suggest you help her nalang. :)
I will! The best revenge to people who did bad thing to us is doing the righteous thing back to them. I have encountered multiple person often do and say bad to me upfront and at my back. But, I don’t mind. I get hurt, anyone will get hurt but choosing to do good things toward those people is our pride and best revenge to them. Marerealize nila yan for sure. Proven and tested na 😊
PS. Besides yung favor mo naman from the past is about material thing na baka kasi sobrang importante din sa kanya, I don’t know if she has an extra lappy to use or not. Pero this time, maybe it’s not too much to give her a glimpse of idea how freelancing works. Actually, adding that person to a grp like this can be considered as a help na.
Pray for discernment. Mahirap naman na sabihin namin sayo what to do, pero sa puso mo di pa ready or buo na gawin yun. Im a certain the right decision will come to you with the guidance of the Holy spirit.
I would help her. Pagkukulang nya ang di sya tumulong at pananagutan nya yun. Mas maginhawa sa pakiramdam na nakatulong ka kaya be proud of yourself dahil nalagpasan mo mga pagsubok mo at kaya mo nang tumulong. Wag lang apabuso na maging spoonfeeding na mangyayari. Better yet, ipaalala mo ang ginawa nya at sabihin mong despite nun e handa kang tumulong.
If teacher po sya dri possible na need nya laptop or naiisip nya baka msira ( mahrap namn po tlga mag ipon for laptop lalo sa sahud ng teacher sa PH) if blood related help, khit hndi ka pamlya wag isipin ang msamang pingdaan bngyan ka ni ama ng mgandang buhay after the struggle stop natin ang isipin gnyan:) tulong once sya na bahala panu sya matutu, piliin nating maging mabuti maraming magagalit peru mas maraming mag mamahal sayo ♥️
There is no right answer to this as this is very personal to you. However, if you can please take the high road. You do not have to sit down with her and really go through all the process BUT you can direct her to guidelines online. AND emphasize that if she wanted to succeed online, she needs to take advantage of all the free resources that she can find via Google. Anyways, she will be needing this kind of resourcefulness when she ventures online.
Seeing her plight is enough. Don't follow the eye for an eye concept. Help her for that what Christianity is. God helped you when you were down and He is using you to show kindness to your relative. God bless.
I will help... Pero ireremind ko sya dun sa ginawa nya sa yo about dn a laptop and eexplain at ipapaliwanag na kng sakali magkaganun uli, wag magdadamot bagkus tumulong...😊😊😊 at the end of that... Ikaw p rn po ang magiging masaya kasi nkatulong k ng hindi nagdamot at walang hinihinging kapalit😊😊😊
Be the better person :)
:: Yes, however yung level of help could vary depending on how much you have healed or willing to give. Based on how you worded the story you have not forgotten the situation which is normal. While the "blood related" person appears to have forgotten the events (or maybe she is really in desperate need). Since God has given you the opportunity to help, you may want to take advantage to be channel of His blessing.
"To err is human, to forgive" divine sabi nga. Sa huli, maaaring ito ang paraan ng Dios para ipadama sayo na hindi ka Nya pinabayaan. Binigyan ka Nya ng tagumpay at ngayon binibigyan ka Nya ng pagkakataong maging pagpapala sa iba. 😄
Don't be like her. Help when you are needed and if you can. ❤❤❤
Forgiveness is key.
Kill them with kindness ❤❤❤ Only God can give her lesson. Just be kind.
You know the feeling to be in that situation and you knew from there na ayaw mo maging ka tulad nya. As long as you can help na maluwag sa loob so be it. 😊❤️
When u forgive, you heal. Sobrang hirap magpatawad. Pero ikaw pa rin talo pag hindi nagpatawad.
Let her realize that you are the bigger person. You will feel so much better.
Your actions will reveal the kind of person that you are. You wouldn’t even have to ask us.💗💗💗
I love the comments very positive and good vibes. Always stay humble and kind for you will always reap what you sow. ♥️
i've been in this situation.. always do what is right memsh... at the end of the day blessing will come...
Do what God wants you to do.
I can only imagine what you have gone through. If I were you, I would have felt very disappointed. She didn't help you but look at your state today. That means God did help you in His own miraculous way. Now, she needs help, and God is choosing you as an instrument. God will reward you more than you can imagine if you do the right thing. ♥️♥️♥️
maybe what I'll do is just give her some links she can check then that's it. I did that 😁😁✌✌✌
Maybe you need to open up to this person first sis since nabasa ko naman sa previous comment mo kung ano yung relationship mo sa kanya which is ayoko ng banggitin to avoid unnecessary comments. I think by telling her na nasaktan ka talaga sa ginawa niya before, it will be easier for you to forgive or forget her previous shortcomings. In that way, magiging bukal na sa kalooban mo yung pagtulong mo sa kanya. Malay mo eto rin yung paraan para mas maging okay yung relationship niyo at be happy na rin kasi naging inspiration ka sa kanya to pursue freelancing 😊 I believe that we should always practice being kind to other people no matter what the situation is. The more we do good, the more blessings that we'll receive. Hope you'll be okay sis 💖
Let bygones be bygones. Extend help regardless of what she did to you in the past. Sabi nga nila mas mabuti ng ikaw ang tumulong kesa ikaw ang tulungan. Just consider it as a blessing na nakatulong ka. 😊
You're better than her.. why not help if you can?
Teach him the basic but let him discover the rest. Ikaw for sure ngsumikap ka to learn the trade and tinuruan/natuto s iba. Remember blessing comes to those people who extend their hands and doesn't expect anything in return.
Overcome evil with good.
Yes give her some resources for her to learn. That’s already a big help. But it’s NOT YOU who will teach her or spoon feed her. No.
You know you're a better person than what she was back then.
Why limit yourself to be like her at her worst? Show and teach her what goodness is like. hope to inspire her to be a good person by being one to her.
You should be better than being her mirror.
my mercy prevails over my wrath.
Well, to be honest, for me, nope. Maybe I can show a few helpful links pero hanggang dun lang talaga.
Be the better person. You have nothing to lose if you lend a hand.
Let me encourage you with this scripture that also I have been learning and keep on reminding myself everytime people are seems so unfair:
1Peter 3:9 Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.
Look at her the way Jesus looks at her, just like Jesus looks at us - with grace and compassion .forgive her my dear though hindi madali pero you have to kasi yun yung kind of heart n gusto ni God for us. ..and you can talk to her about your heart pra walang bitterness sa heart.. :) pray ka muna before you talk to her para maguide ka ni God sa sasabihin mo..will pray for you..:)
Spend your time helping other people who badly need it, not this one.
I think that's more productive.
Try to help her. Coz at the end of the day you did something good.
Be kind even if others are not.
Yes, help him/her. Let’s do good even if that person hurt you before. You’ll see it will return more blessing to you.
Hi! for me honestly. don't treat them the same way they treated you. ^_^ pakita mo ung kaibahan. you give not because of who they are, how they were to you.. but you give because this is who you are..forgive and kung ano man nangyari think of it as a blessing.. kasi kung di ka ginanun.. wala ka ngayon sa upper hand.. 😎 di ka nagkautang na loob, sila ung magkaka hehe
Yes, still help her despite of what she has done. Karma na nya yung struggle in transitioning. If she learn and earn then that's good but if she fail atleast you still try to teach her.
I say, just give them directions, but let them do their own "driving".. So they appreciate how it is to start from scratch..
If I were you, I'll still help her, cuz I'm better than her. Kindness is the best revenge. Di nya aaminin pero maaalala nya na naging bitch sya sa ginawa nya sayo thru your kindness.
Freelancing was a somewhat "unknown" source of income back then anyone would be reluctant to lend you their hard earned item for the purpose of something they arent sure of. Its up to you. All i can say is its hard for a person to carry a grudge, much more if youre carrying a grudge against family. I would say you should just forget about the incident 9 years ago and move forward. Now concerning helping her its really up to you and what kind of help she needs. All i can say is give her a spoon but dont feed her with it.
Yes. Always be kind, no matter what. God has made you successful despite all hurdles you’ve been through. The world needs more good people 😊
As long as willing ka to help. You can set a side whatever happened back then, kung kaya mo. Pero if not, take your time. And, pray na mawala na yun sama ng loob mo.
It is best to Help her. Do what is right and give her a smirk 😏 but teach her a lesson that sharing is caring.
Don't help! There are too many of those kinds of people. I've been a victim of them and I'm sure I've victimized people too whether knowingly or not out of spite.
The best way is really to remind them and then distance yourself. If you really must then offer to treat the person out for a meal. Breaking bread together can be a soothing experience for you but don't give in too much because believe me, THEY HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN THAT TIME.
It's better to help another person you don't know rather than someone you know or are related to but turned you down.
Yes. I will. I will never do what she did because it hurt me before. She never forgets it. Never. She knows you have a good heart kaya lumapit pa rin cya sayo kahit alam niyang she ignored you when you were in her situation.
I'd say be the better person, you only live once.. you'll feel better once you let go all of that negative feelings and forgive that person.
been there , done that. be the bigger person, and hope she/he is human to accept and change her ways. people need this. our world is full of negativity, break the cycle.
Always be a blessing to others.
Just provide her with the starter pack knowledge re freelancing. Pag madiskarte sya, she doesn't even need to ask for info na. Me Google and YouTube to help her. Pag gumanti ka, ano pinagkaiba mo sa knya? Sharing some info to her wouldn't hurt you and consider it as a way of giving back to freelancing community. Even though me Hindi ka magandang experience sa knya before, look at you now! You have surpassed all the struggles. You made it this far, so aminin mo man o hindi ung pag turn down nya sa u dati Isa un sa mga dahilan that brings you to where you are today. God bless you madam.
I'd help this person if I can. In the end, you wouldn't want to turn out to be the same person that she was when you needed her help. :) Masarap matulog when you have peace of mind. But if the memory is still fresh and it gets in the way of you helping her, talk about it maybe before giving her what she needs.
Expectations breed disappointment. It was her laptop so it was her choice not to share and despite your struggles you shouldn't have expected her to lend it to you. Despite that, I agree with helping her by giving her the resources to do her own research and outreach. I wouldn't help her with a job offer or hand holding since she didn't go out of her way too help you in the past. Help her help herself lol.
Like, "Oh kailangan mo nang tulong? Here's a YOUTUBE video and an article that helped me a lot. Study that. BYE."
Hep her no matter what happened. "Ang nagbibigay ay mananatiling busog." 2 Corinthians 9:6-8
Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.
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